Saturday, 29 December 2012
TV and chocolate time.
First and foremost, I hope you all had an absolutely wonderful Christmas and got lots of lovely pressies and ate lots of scrummy (un-healthy) food! I had a lovely Christmas with my family and friends. That's all I really wanted - to spend time with everyone.
I've just about recovered from the madness of it all now. Christmas Day was a little crazy - driving all over the county to see people - and by Boxing Day I was definitely feeling it. So much so that I spent the entire day in front of the TV... Eating chocolates! I felt so much better for having rested though. I was getting terrible pains from rushing around so much so the best thing I could have done was nothing!
Today the boy had to drive my car in to town to get it MOT'd and unfortunately it failed so it spent the day in the garage being fixed. So that meant we were a little stranded and we ended up having to get the bus back which meant a bit of a walk. I'm in quite a lot of pain today and I know that didn't help. I've been having different pains this last week - still all the usual things around my left hip but now a pulling feeling from my bum to my left leg that especially tugs when I walk. I'm just assuming something else is stuck to something else again. It's a horrible feeling though. Not the normal sharp pains - it just feels strange!
I'm so ready for this operation now. I feel exhausted with the stress of everything and I just want it over with. I am still trying not to think about it all but I do keep finding myself getting upset. It doesn't help that I see so many women putting laser surgery down so much saying it doesn't work and excision surgery is fantastic etc etc etc. A lady said it to me tonight and it's just such a rubbish thing to say to someone when they have been in this situation and have waited so long for any help possible! I know excision surgery is better but it's not even an option for me at the moment. I am having a surgery that didn't work for me first time around but hey, it's something. It's certainly going to be better than not being able to have any sort of life. But hey ho, if you can afford all that fancy stuff then that's fantastic for you. Unfortunately I can't because of the situation this disease has left me in. Sorry for ranting a little but it's so frustrating. It makes me feel like giving up on everything because this surgery is rubbish and pointless and a waste of time and I can't afford the expensive surgery so I don't have any choices. When in actual fact I have been trying my up most to be positive about it because this will work and it will give me my life back and get me back to work and will allow me to have a baby because it will get rid of everything forever and I will never have problems again... OK, going a little too far there but you get my point!
You may have seen on my Instagram that the boy got me my Christmas present while we were in town today. We had set a small-ish budget this year as there wasn't really anything we wanted it needed so we decided to be more sensible with our money. But I couldn't find anything I wanted, so, while we were in town today, I dragged the boy to this little antiques shop and he bought me a beautiful 9ct gold diamond and pink stone ring. It's stunning and I'm so happy with it!
Tomorrow we are heading in to the hell that is the Christmas sales! I am dreading it but I want to spend some vouchers that my mama got me. We are taking it as a leisurely shopping trip though - no stressing, just a wander and then a sit down for some food.
I have my pre-assessment on Monday morning so I'm going to have to be up super super early because it's at 08:30am on the other side of Leicester. Just what I need on the one day I'm heading out for a night out! I think I'll have to have a disco nap before celebrating New Years!
But anyhow, yes, I'm off out! It's a very rare occurrence me going out but since I haven't been out since July I thought it'd be nice to get out for a bit. We are not doing anything too fancy, just going to a local pub and sitting in one spot all night but it'll be spent with my friends and the boy and it'll definitely help to take my mind off my op. I may even have a little drink!
I did the blog up a little tonight - changed a few fonts here and there, swapped the layout around and touched up a few bits. I think I like it now but I must do my header soon! It'll only take a few minutes so I don't know why it seems to be taking me forever to get done! Hope you all think it looks a little better though!
I'm off now but I will speak to you all again in the new year. I hope you all have a lovely time celebrating the dawning of 2013 with your loved ones. And I pray the new year brings you all strength, unity, peace and hope - if not with each other then at least with yourselves.
Bye bye horrible 2012.